Pat Knoke was one of the most intelligent people I have ever known. Now, she would disagree because she never thought of herself as smart since she didn’t finish school. But she was sharp, quick-witted, wise, and even cunning.
She was an avid game player – clever at cards, Scrabble, dominoes, or anything else you invited her to play. And how she ever solved those cryptograms, I’ll never know! She was logical, tenacious, and crafty, yet always gracious in winning or loss. On team games, she often suggested the winning play, then would turn around and give all the credit to her teammates. But she didn’t mind losing, so long as you played fair.
Perhaps that is what made her the perfect match for Ron Knoke. He’s a strong personality who typically needs to be in charge. She honored him in a way her generation understood so well. She met his every need, even providing what he didn’t know he needed. Many have remarked through the years on her ability to suggest an idea, let him think it over, then congratulate him on the idea once he had agreed to it. “Oh, that’s a good idea, Ronnie” she would say in a matter-of-fact tone. It was a skill that many executives wish they had, the skill of leading from behind.
Throughout it all, there was plenty of humor. She was so funny, and the joke always seemed to come out of nowhere. Whether it was her and Grandpa playing jokes on each other in front of the butcher, or quick jabs among us at the house, we all laughed a lot. My favorite always came on the wedding anniversary we shared. They would call me and Mark to wish us a happy anniversary, and she was quick to point out that he and I are just rookies. And I would always ask, “So, are you going to keep him?” to which she would reply that she was still keeping her options open.
She did not need to be first, or the best, or in the spotlight. She was happy to be beside the man she loved, with the family that was devoted to her. She was happy to let you do the talking, would give her wise opinion when asked, and was fiercely loyal to her family, her friends, her church.
When Grandpa and Mom made the hard decision to move her to Brookridge so she could get the care she needed, he took it especially hard. They had never been apart more than a few days since 1950. When I called to check on him, he told me he thought she would be all right there. “Honey, I know they’ll take good care of her. She is the sweetest, kindest person I know, and everyone who meets her can’t help but love her.”
He has never been more right.
Thoughts from My Hammock 